Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church,his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Day 26: SUMBMISSION
Yes ladies for today’s dare we come to that word “SUBMIT”! Submit is a kind of word that you can have a love/hate relationship with it depending on how you look at it.
Let’s look at what submit means if we go to: http://av1611.com/kjbp/kjv-dictionary/submit.html, we will see their meaning of what submit means.
One meaning they give is: “To yield, resign or surrender to the power, will or authority of another.”
Another meaning by http://www.thefreedictionary.com/submit, says:
2. To subject to a condition or process.
3. To commit (something) to the consideration or judgment of another. See Synonyms at propose.
4. To offer as a proposition or contention: I submit that the terms are entirely unreasonable.
1. To give in to the authority, power, or desires of another. See Synonyms at yield.
2. To allow oneself to be subjected to something.
Another place to get idea on this topic is at: http://peacefulwife.com/2013/07/26/biblical-submission-a-huge-key-to-peace/ Who’s also doing this dare too.
If you look online or any Christian bookstore you will find a lot of people have their own say on this topic, but what is most important is what God has to say about it and what He expects from you.
Today I am going to share with you my experience with submitting to my husband. When I first became a Follower of Jesus Christ two years ago and was learning what He expected from me, there was one thing that was made very clear to me: TO RESPECT OTHER AUTHORITY FIGURES THAT ARE PLACED IN MY LIFE!
This was big a problem for me because all my life I have done nothing but disrespected any kind authority that came anywhere near me! Now not only was I being asked to respect God’s authority over me but to also to respect the authority that God had given to my husband over me. I had to not only submit to God but now my husband too and I was not the least bit happy about this! God was one thing but man NO WAY BUDDY! This was my attitude.
I grew up seeing just what happens when you submit to man in my mom’s life and in my very own life and it was not pretty! Men basically treated you like you were their puppet to do as they please with you and you had no say so what so ever in the matter. I had spent way too many years fighting (literally) my way out of ever letting another man ever again in my life have that much power over me and I was not about to let that happen again!
So yes I hated the word ‘”SUBMIT” with all my heart and not only that I hated to submit to anyone, let alone a man! So I fought hard with this whole submitting to my husband for a very long time in fact it was not till a couple of months ago that I am finally starting to understand what God means by submitting to one another. But this took a lot of time to see things as God sees them and not through my past and what the world has taught me about submitting to my husband.
For those first two years of our marriage it was an all out war between my husband and I because we were both trying to be the boss of each other and of ourselves! Neither one of us understood what it meant to submit to God and then to each other. My husband saw things as he was the head of the household because God said so and I was to do as he said! And this attitude right there my ladies is the wrong attitude for a man to have!
If you look closely to what the Bible says about submitting you will see that’s it not only a way one street but it also a two-way street too.Yes the husband is the head of the household but he is to use that authority that God has given him out of discernment. And he is not to behave in a way like he’s on some power trip to control his wife!
Because that is not what God intended man to do with the authority he was given it was privilege he was given and it was one not to be abuse for his own advantages. instead he is to look to God always in the ways he should go with his wife, he is to guide her, lead her in the right directions, he is to make the best wise decision together with his wife, he is to listen her and take in consideration what she has to say, they are to work together and not apart from each other. Their main goal is to always be leading each other back to God and following Him! Then the wife will in return would want to submit to her husband willingly.
But this is not always the case and this is when God calls us to a tall order to submit to our husband no matter how he may be acting or not acting! Now we are not to tolerate abuse or to go along with any sin, there are some boundaries to where the line is drawn.
But if that is not the case then we are to win our husband over by being an example to him by obeying God and doing what He has asked us to do. That means loving our husbands unconditionally, respecting him in all things, let him be the head of the house, forgiving him, and always extending mercy and grace to him. And to be real honest this is not always easy to do!
Two years into this marriage and I am now just learning how to submit to my husband, but it is hard! And there are still days I struggle because of my fears of letting go one hundred percent and just trusting God with my husband. It’s hard to be sitting in a boat on a very big lake knowing that at any moment if my husband moves the wrong way there’s a likely chance that either the both of us are going to drown, or I am going to be the one who drowns! So it’s imperative that I step in and save us before it’s too late!
But see this is where I need to learn to have faith in My God knowing that yes I may have to face the consequences of my husband not obeying God, but God will not let me drown! That He will be right there to rescue me from whatever it is my husband and I are going through at that moment, but this is not a risk I am always willing to take.
So instead I fight against God and my husband to make sure I do not feel the fire of my husband consequences. But wait what about the consequences that my husband got to face from me not obeying God and submitting not only to Him but my husband too? Hmm never thought of it that way.. Like I said before everything is a two way street in marriage and this is something I really need to keep reminding myself of.
One thing I have come to understand about submitting to one another is that when it’s done the way God intended it to be it’s quite beautiful! It comes together in ways you least expect it too, but it works! If only we (I) could let go of our fears, the misconceptions we (I) have about submitting and learn to trust God NO MATTER WHAT! Then and only then we would get to experience some of that beauty too in submitting to our husband. Till then I will keep on trying to be the wife God has called me to be by falling down, dusting myself off and learning to get right back up trying again and again if need be!
If possible, on your part, live at peace with everyone. Romans 12:18 This will be my motto to live by as I am learning to submit to my husband.
Today I will only posting only some of the questions that are Nina Roesner book, because they are pretty long.
SO WHAT ABOUT YOU?
Question 1: Do you struggle with trying to control your husband? Why or why not? How has this issue manifested itself in your own marriage?
Yes I do, because I have a hard time trusting that my husband will do what’s best for us. Because of this there’s a lot of tension in our home, anger, resentment and my husband feeling like I don’t respect him.
Question 2: What do you feel is your biggest struggle or fear with putting your husband in charge of your home?
I would have to say trusting him.
Question 3: What is the worst thing that could happen possibly happen to you if you allowed your husband to have the final say if the two of you disagreed about something and a decision had to be made?
WOW! I never thought about things that way. I am always to busy thinking with my feelings of what I don’t like or what I am not comfortable with, but never thinking in the sense what’s worst that could happen to me if he did make the decision. Hmm.. it could be no worse than what I have all ready been through in my life, but just thought of it makes me quiver! I just don’t like the boat to get rocked! I want smooth sailing all the time, but that’s not how life works or God is it? Something to be ponder.
Question 4: What do you sense God could do to take care of that situation if it occurred?
WOW! In His time He would turn it all around so that it would be a testimony for His glory! WOW! What a revelation I just had no matter what I may go through, and no matter how bad it may look to me God does always turn it around into a blessing! And He stands right there beside me to get me through it! He also gives me the peace and strength I need while I am going through the emotions. I can let go of my fears because My God Has got my back no matter what! Praise God for this break through! Tears are falling I can let go My God will take care of me! HALLELUJIAH!
Nina Roesner ask that we “Pray wholeheartedly that God shows how this concept of allowing your husband to be the CEO of your family impacts your marriage.” “Ask Him to help you to be teachable and pray that you learn.” “Ask Him to give you an understanding of the concept in a way that allows you and your husband to be united in Spirit.” God Bless To ALL….
Remember if you are just joining us, I am doing “The Respect Dare” 40 day challenge along with the ladies at Unbroken Women.
Don’t forget to visit The Unbroken Women to enter to win gifts and to win the Kindle Fire I Dare You!
WOW! Ladies was today’s dare as challenging as it was for me? If so please tell me about it. I would love to hear what God is revealing to you too.
Love Always One Of God’s Children 8/4/2013